self improvement is the only way to a better life
but it’s very difficult to do

as with all things there is no forcing yourself to change

you need motivation,
a push from emotion

it’s a five step dance

  1. awareness of the thought or action

notice what you’re thinking about
notice your thoughts often

your thoughts run in patterns
the same is true for your actions

  1. motivation

to change you need motivation

the most powerful motivation is pain

why do you want to change?
go back in time and live through the moment again

live it deeply and feel it

how many years have you had this pain?
how many more years do want to keep it?

imagine yourself ten years in the future
put yourself there
do you still want to have this pain?

when you feel suffering
you have motivation

  1. ask positive questions

you need something to replace the old pattern with

learning is also unlearning

you must discard old patterns of thought
and learn new ones

a simple way to change a thought pattern is to ask questions
(the first step was awareness of the thought pattern)

which way do I want to be?
which thoughts do I wish to have?
what do I want to learn?
what is interesting to me?
who is a good role model?

who inspires me?
how does that person speak and behave?
if I could have a conversation with anyone who would it be?
what would that conversation sound like?

what activities do I like to do?
what is my dream job?
which parts of my life do i need to change?
and so on

as you contemplate the answers to these questions
you have changed the pattern of thought in your mind

practice open mind
imagine every possibility

don’t pass judgment against your answers

you’re looking for your truths
not the ones you were told to have

ask positive questions and let your mind open
to you

flexibility is in every step

4. when you learn a lesson
make a change to your thoughts and actions

all self improvement happens within

if no change happens to your thoughts and actions
no improvement has been made to your life

for example: if you get a promotion at work
it feels like your life has improved
but on the inside you’re still the same
you still have the same wounds
you still have the same thoughts and patterns

if no change is made within
no lesson has been learned
even when you remember it well

If you change your appearance nothing is changed
tomorrow and tomorrow
you still feel the pain

the changes within are the only way to a better life

5.  practice

in karate you practice the same punch a thousand times
and you do it slowly

in your old patterns
you do the same thoughts and actions
a thousand times

now you’re going to do the new thought
a thousand times

each time you have the old thought
1 have awareness of it
2 feel the pain it causes
3 ask yourself what you want to replace it with
4 make the change to your thoughts and actions
5 practice often

the reasons change takes a long time
is because you are trying to break a pattern or habit
and replace it

life moves in harmony with change

it happens everywhere
it happens to you
with or without conscious thought

you can decide which direction to go


when you take small steps
one at a time
its easier to hold on to a change

when the step is too big
its easy to fall back

the only way to take a big leap forward
and hold on to it
is to pass through the massive pain of a life altering moment

change is very difficult
everyone falls

what you fall
try again (practice)